I was playing Call of Duty 4 (COD4) last weekend during my post-CES recovery time, aka 12 hours of Xbox intermixed with buffalo wings and an hour of hockey. When I first went online to play, I pretty well expected to get a whuppin’, and a whuppin’ I received. That evening I played with my 12-year-old cousin in Montreal 1v1, and he steadily handed my ass to me over and over again. I think Xbox Live needs a “Seniors League” for people over 30.
First, the league would allow you to opt-out, so for the hardcore gamers, you can go play with whomever you like. But for the rest of us, I think it’d be a very good system. It would allow me to stop listening to the utter depravity that occurs in the chatroom (more foul, disgusting, racy language I have never heard in such a short time). Actually, on that topic for a second, parents – hello, your teenage children need some attention and by attention I don’t just mean warm hugs and telling them how they’re so great all the time.
More importantly, it might give me a way to play the game with the other stumbling buffoons like me. Those of us who are pleasantly surprised when we actually get a good shot off or two, where a dominating streak is defined as two consecutive kills, and where we don’t spend half the game looking at the Xbox controller wondering just how on Earth that guy did that!?!?!
The one game that probably doesn’t need the Seniors League is Rock Band, whose online multiplayer is about the coolest thing I’ve seen. It’s the only game I’m aware of that has no competition, nothing but fun/pride. And let me tell you, when four people are playing together, and really “jamming” (real musicians: don’t hate us, we’re just having fun), it’s a good time. Hitting star power on a song together? Priceless.
If the Senior League is too much to figure out, how about just a Rookie Zone, which works on a game-by-game basis? After anyone reaches a certain score and/or hours playing, they get bumped into the regular area. If you need an incentive, I’m pretty confident that you’d sell more games. Huh? Listening now, I see? Well, go ask your prime gamer demographic (oh wait, that’s me!) about their Xbox Live experiences. Probably a lot of frustration across the board. As a terrible player, playing online is often too annoying, rarely as fun as it should be. More fun = more Xbox Live time = more Xbox time = more interest in new games = more money for MSFT.
Oh, and to the jerk who marked me as ‘unsportsmanlike’ I’m gonna guess this refers to my frequent accidental grenading of my own teammates. Maybe if you spent more time playing as a team and helping us old fogies out, we’d play better and stop doing it. I’m just too terrible to even play unsportsmanlike! You’ll understand in 20 years, kid.