- Thou Shalt Avoidest Using the Term Social Media, Except When Specifically Discussing Social Media
- Thou Shalt Not Use Thine Blog or Twitter Purely to Show Off About all the Cool People Thou Know, nor the Secrets Thou Art Entrusted With
- Thou Shalt Not Use Twitter in Conjunction With a Service Which Updates Itself Automatically and Frequently
- Thou Shalt Not Complain When Thine Family Professes Ignorance of the Contents of Thine Blog
- Thou Shalt Not Put Embarrassing Photos of Thine Self on Thine Facebook Page, for They Shalt Be Easily Found in the Future
- Thou Shalt Not Be a Bad Commentor, Nor Shalt Thou Be a Sycophantic Fool
- Thou Shalt Not Exclaim With False Surprise at Quantity of Thine Followers
- Thou Shalt Not Assume That all Humans use FriendFeed
- Thou Shalt Not Poke, Bite, Nor Throweth Sheep, Yet Thou Mayest Be a Pirate
- Thou Shalt Not Forward Urban Myths. Ever
- Thou Shalt Not Create Video Podcasts of Thineself With a Duration Countable in Minutes
- Thou Shalt Not Befriend all People Thou Hast Ever Encountered, No Matter How Briefly
- Thou Shalt Not Describe New Startups as the Blank of Blank, Nor the Killer of Blank, Nor the Social Blank, nor the Blank 2.0
- Thou Shalt Not Spend Thine Day Reading Blogs, Leaving Comments, Writing Tweets, Updating Facebook Statuses, and then Complain About Thine Busy Schedule
- Thou Shalt Not Assume That All Content Received in Email or Read on Web Pages is Factually Accurate
- Thou Shalt Not Asketh a Question on Twitter When a Simple Google Search Wouldst Suffice
- Thou Shalt Not Confuse Transparency With Invasion of Privacy
- Thou Shalt Not Transform Bloggers’ Names Into Verbs, Such as Scoble-ized or Louis Gray-ed
- Thou Shalt Enjoy Thine Internet Fame (if Bestowed), for it is Surely Fleeting
- Thou Must Never, Ever, Whine About the Sacred TechMeme. It is All-Seeing and All-Powerful and Must Not Be Questioned